It was the thirty seventh day of my journey, my travels had
led me to high see around the Bermuda triangle in the Caribbean sea. In the distance I could see what looked to be
a raft bearing a white distress flag. I
decided to sail in closer for a better look.
As I neared I could see that on this raft was the most beautiful caramel
skinned woman I had ever seen! I called
to her to see if she needed help. “YES!”,
she replied! I let her on board immediately. She then pleaded to me to help her! She said
she didn’t have much to offer me, but she did have “Deez nuts”. “Excuse me?!” I replied. “Deez Nuts!” she said, as she reached into her Gucci
purse and pulled out a handful of the most beautiful golden brown roasted
nuts. She then began to explain to me
that they were the very own family recipe of Captain Deez, a well known and
respected pirate in the Caribbean region.
She said the nuts where roasted with the flavors of the finest pirate
rum that can only be found in a secluded part of the Carribean controlled by
the infamous Captain Deez. She didn’t have
to say it, but I could tell by the brand on her wrist that she was the head
wench of Captain Deez, and was more than likely trying to flee from him and get
to freedom. I immediately knew I was in
grave danger. It wasn’t two seconds from
the time I put up the main sail to high tail it to safety that a cannon ball
came crashing through my hull. I turned
to my six o’clock and saw the mighty Grandus Shcrotus, a giant greek vessel
that had been seized by Captain Deez and made his own. I immediately knew what I had to do! I looked at the beauty of the woman that I
had rescued and knew that he was coming after his beloved treasure which I
would never give up! So I did the only
logical thing that could be done. I
threw her overboard to make my boat lighter and faster to sail away to freedom
with Deez beloved nuts!
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